Wouldn’t you love to have a screen-free night? Or week? Next month, take the plunge by plugging into Screen-Free Week (screenfree.org), May 4-10. It can be a much-needed, challenging exercise that provides a sense of accomplishment. For many families, however, it’s also a relief to return to a screen-oriented lifestyle afterwards. In fact, it can be hard to imagine going without TV or internet devices on a regular basis… but it’s just for one week for now! My family attempts to embrace screen-free living as much as possible. Here are some practical screen time substitutions:

Morning 

Morning in our household consists of getting three children out the door to elementary and middle school. I’m up at 5:30 am to snatch a bit of time for myself. By 6:30 am, my girls are getting dressed; a quick check of the weather forecast (usually on an iPod or smartphone) and wardrobes are selected. Tip: Check the weather in the daily newspaper instead of on a screen, which can easily lead to additional screen time.

Within a half hour, everyone gathers for breakfast. We eat together most days (minus dad, who usually leaves for work before we’re up). Over breakfast, we review the day’s activities. Then I read the newspaper, my eldest occasionally looking over my shoulder at the sports news. Occasionally, we all discuss an interesting news item that I’ve chosen to share with them. Tip: Eat together at the breakfast table, rather than in front of the television!

Dr. Amy Nathanson, Associate Professor of Communication at Ohio State University, points out the crucial nature of parents filtering the news for their children. “Depending on their age and development, children simply aren’t ready to hear the kind of information news stories typically contain. In many cases, exposing children to news stories only results in their becoming frightened without the ability to effectively manage their fear.” Developmental pediatrician Dr. Mark Bertin agrees. “The news has become really disturbing. The images shown and the information shared aren’t things many kids are ready to hear in that format.”

By 8 am everyone is gone. I head to my office where I work at my computer (well, this is unavoidable). The morning is otherwise screen-free and you can follow suit.

Afternoon

Elementary school dismisses at 2:30 pm and my younger two arrive home shortly after. They empty their backpacks and scoot up to the kitchen counter for a snack. I stand and chat with them for a bit. Soon, my eldest returns from middle school and homework time is underway. The TV in our family room sits dark. Except for my teen listening to her iPod in her room and instruments being practiced, the house is still. Tip: Unnecessary use of screens and devices create distractions. If the homework assignment is book and paper only, there is no need to have background elements like TV or music.

It’s 4 pm: one child reads on a couch while another plays Legos nearby. Even though the television is right there, they don’t ask to turn it on. No TV during playtime, as it turns out, is a good thing. “Children’s play sessions are shorter and less sophisticated when background TV is present than when it is not,” says Nathanson. “Because children learn a tremendous amount from playing, the detrimental effect of background TV on children’s play is significant.”

Before I start dinner preparations, I urge my middle child into the kitchen to work on her birthday wish list. She has no ideas of course. It’s not that she’s an odd child with no desires; nor are we indulgent parents buying her everything she requests. Essentially, without television marketing to influence her, she lives relatively satisfied with what she has. The wish list grows slowly.

I move on to cooking dinner. Sometimes my children ask to play a video game together during the dead time before dinner; and often I allow it. Because it’s a limited time and I know exactly what they’ll be seeing on the monitor, I’m comfortable with it. And I’m not alone. Lesley Wagner, a mother of three, also keeps her days relatively television free. But she admits to limited TV time before dinner. “When my 4-year-old wakes up from his nap, we may watch TV while I’m making dinner ─ maybe for 20-30 minutes.”

As Bertin notes, “Some screen time is a part of life. If children are watching a small amount and we’re closely watching the content, they’ll be fine.” The problem arises when it becomes a habit that takes over. Nathanson explains, “Parents may want to rethink their use of TV when they find they are continually turning to it to satisfy their own or their child’s needs.”

Evening

By 6 pm dad comes home and we sit down to dinner together. My husband takes this time to do his own catch-up with our girls. Soon, our kitchen grows noisy with our girls’ rapid-fire interchange. “When the TV is off during meal time, family members can tune into each other,” says Nathanson. “The reality is that it’s difficult for anyone to ignore the images and sounds coming from a television. By turning the TV off, parents and children can talk and really listen to each other.”

After dinner we all clear the table. Then my husband and I retire to the couch where we catch up some more. In the kitchen, the three girls tease each other and carry on loudly as they wash the dishes. Afterwards, our eldest returns to her homework. Sometimes the rest of us play a board or card game. At 7 pm the bedtime routine starts. Our youngest showers, while the others read. The family room is empty, so my husband sneaks in a quick video game (he can’t help it).

By 8:30 pm, the girls have gone to bed, I read, and my husband settles in with a puzzle. The television remains off. After catching up on Facebook (yes, we’re guilty of computer screen time more than anything), it’s lights out for us. We both drift off easily, not wired by a fast-paced late night TV program.

Screen time does figure into our day, but in relatively small amounts and we’ve been intentional to constrain its limits. Dr. Bertin sums it up well. “Recognize that media doesn’t have to happen to us. We can decide how to use media, even for our kids.” It’s intentionality that makes the difference.

Tips for Limiting Your Family’s Screen Time

• Model intentional viewing habits by turning the TV on only for specific programs.
• Set and keep rules on how and what children will watch.
• Provide reasons for those rules and involve older children in deciding on the rules.
• Don’t place televisions/computers in children’s rooms or other places where they can’t be easily monitored. Consider limiting where tablets and laptops can be used.